zondag, juni 01, 2008

I must admit, i've never been in a proper, proper relationship.

Even with the others, it was all about the mind games, the spiteful remarks, the lying, let's not forget the cheating, and then more lying, hiding, insinuating msgs to other people, basically flirting with anything that moved.


But now, we're almost 4 days shy of our 16th month, though not a remarkable milestone, but nonetheless made me sit and think for a while.

(I have alot of time to think right now, alot, DONT FUCKING ASK ME WHY. JUST ASK QANTAS.)

So back to the thinking part.

I really couldn't have done all these without pure, so fucking pure, love.


He was the pillar of my strength, he was the light at the end of the tunnel, pushing me to do things i've never done, somehow, telepathically sending me all the courage and determination to go on.


Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved, now and then joyfully, then sadly, waiting to learn whether or not fate will hear us - I can live only wholly with you or not at all - Yes, I am resolved to wander so long away from you until I can fly to your arms and say that I am really at home with you, and can send my soul enwrapped in you into the land of spirits - Yes, unhappily it must be so - You will be the more contained since you know my fidelity to you. No one else can ever possess my heart - never - never - Oh God, why must one be parted from one whom one so loves. And yet my life in V is now a wretched life - Your love makes me at once the happiest and the unhappiest of men - At my age I need a steady, quiet life - can that be so in our connection? My angel, I have just been told that the mailcoach goes every day - therefore I must close at once so that you may receive the letter at once - Be calm, only by a calm consideration of our existence can we achieve our purpose to live together - Be calm - love me - today - yesterday - what tearful longings for you - you - you - my life - my all - farewell. Oh continue to love me - never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.


ever thine
ever mine
ever ours

i think its 12:28 a.m. now

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